Among many things that vie for our attention and most of the times do manage to get it are of course Smartphones, Tablets, etc. They really have kept us engrossed across apps, tweets, FB messages and Instagrams.
This morning was no different, staring at the many green buttons that emerged on my FB chat window, some of who also were parts of the Gmail chat app as well. Each of those green buttons meant something, a need to connect a need to feel connected. Yet, none of them were possibly really connected to anyone.
This is the biggest paradox of the times that we live in, we have more ‘friends’ than any past generation ever did, we have more means to talk, chat, scream, dialogue than any past generation, yet we are bereft of any emotional fulfilment that these should bring. For most of us, this is an addictive companion who you want to have by your side, but don’t want to engage too much with. The makers of social media realize this probably, which is why there are harmless, easy, non engaging measures like the ‘Like’ button which is a convenient means of engaging and not engaging at the same time. And there of course is a film reel kind of roll of people’s thoughts, actions, photos, inanities all of which pass in front of us as we munch popcorn and watch this movie unfold. The movie is ours, we are supposedly actors in that film, yet we are happy playing cameos if I may, brushing through scenes that we ‘like’ vicariously enjoying watching what others are doing and saying.
This is the biggest paradox of the times that we live in, we have more ‘friends’ than any past generation ever did, we have more means to talk, chat, scream, dialogue than any past generation, yet we are bereft of any emotional fulfilment that these should bring. For most of us, this is an addictive companion who you want to have by your side, but don’t want to engage too much with. The makers of social media realize this probably, which is why there are harmless, easy, non engaging measures like the ‘Like’ button which is a convenient means of engaging and not engaging at the same time. And there of course is a film reel kind of roll of people’s thoughts, actions, photos, inanities all of which pass in front of us as we munch popcorn and watch this movie unfold. The movie is ours, we are supposedly actors in that film, yet we are happy playing cameos if I may, brushing through scenes that we ‘like’ vicariously enjoying watching what others are doing and saying.
Recall childhood, for anyone who is at least 25 years old, and the riot that the playground would have been or that recess break in school, with kids tumbling over each other, racing to the canteen or the nearest goody store, engaging, laughing. Why school-play, think back to canteen days in college, how engaged we were, constantly being fulfilled emotionally by laughter, leg-pulling, sometimes being the perpetrators, many times the victim.
What we do now is anything but this. Have to admit, there is a hands-off comfort to this engagement, us cocooned in our cosy corners, not exposed, or out there, having to adjust, follow norms and mores in the real world. Dare-say there is safety of some kind. But at what cost?
Now when am done with this blog, look back at the other window and see 600 Friends, I think, when did I roll in the mud last with any of them…
What do you feel about this?
Thank you for saying (or typing) what at least some of us are thinking.
ReplyDeleteA small reality check self-experiment for all of us is, when we share good/bad stuff on FB or any other social media; of the people that 'like' or comment - how many would we be willing to actually pick up the phone and call and say 'can you spend 10 minutes of your time engaged in listening to me talk about my life?'. I think the results will probably be eye-opening for most.
I'm so happy that you are one of those few people with whom I can/did share even the lesser known facts. I miss you and our post-dinner drives & conversations, Samir. Glad I've you with me :)
DeleteHmmm. This gets me thinking..
ReplyDeletePurpose satisfied for me? Thanks for reading, Karan!
Deletesadly its true... :(
ReplyDeleteWhy can't we see who you are, nothing wrong in expressing your view openly. Will appreciate if you can comment with your name to help me know you. Thank for reading though!
DeleteWe don't have true friends on social media. We have Keyboard Comrades. They will vouch for you, listen to you, be your friend, everything they can do to help - from the comfort of staying as far away from you as possible.
ReplyDeleteAre we really connected? I think so. The paradigms are changing though. We are at a point where if we don't stay connected on the social media, we are missing out on the evolution of human interaction.
Perhaps we are relying on it too much. Giving social media too much importance would make world we live in fragile. I really like your analogy - when was the last time we even rolled around in mud?
I like and agree with your unbiased view on this, Makdee! I understand that you can't completely abandon using the Social Media, my point was exactly what you mentioned - 'true friends', 'relying on it too much', 'giving it too much importance'. Thanks!
DeleteVery true Ro! attached in detached way.. or vice versa..!
ReplyDeleteYes, true whichever way you look at it. Pleasantly surprised to see your comment on the post, thanks for reading, Swati :)
DeleteIts incredibly empowering on the one hand, yet missing the "touch" if you will, on the other. I get your point Rohan. I believe people will chose wisely, and those who do not - well - its about the same thing that happens each time to those who dont. Wait and see.. there is much more to come.
ReplyDeleteThanks Chit, delighted to see your view on this. Yes, I can only hope people choose wisely. Hope you are doing good.
DeleteI agree..we all crave for some kind of attention now a days, we all want to be in the spotlight.
ReplyDeleteBut I wonder how many of the people who actually "like" our pictures on facebook actually like this. "Liking" our photos is also a way for them to be in the spotlight, grab our attention. Some are genuine while some are not.
I'm not surprised to read your comment on the post, Shivangee. You are one of the very few who do that regularly :) Thank you!
DeleteAbsolutely, you have a point there, and Social Media has served well to cater the lust of such attention-seekers. Some times, people 'Like' more out of obligation - he/she is my friend, anything from him/her and I HAVE to like it.
A great piece Rohan. Every now and then, this thought has made rounds in my mind, so it wasn't any kind of enlightenment but the way you have put it across made me read it twice, no thrice. Very very well written...
ReplyDeleteAnd on that note, how about catching up for real on a weekend?
Thanks Adhish! Pleasing to know you agree with the point.
DeleteI'd have loved to, but not in India for just over an year now - in Germany. I, unfortunately, was travelling for my job interviews when you were here with your wife. In fact, my base was Hannover till a few weeks ago, now moved to Wolfsburg. Let me know if you happen to visit the VW HQ again.